The Kikay Influence

I'm just talking to my hubby yesterday and we came across talking about how I started being vain. I remembered my mom had this mirrored dresser, with all sorts of stuff she puts on her face, and how much I loved being there. She had St. Ives's Apricot Scrub and Oil of Olay Moisturizer among others. Olay was a lot oilier then, which made me shudder away from it. But Apricot Scrub was very nice. That's why it was one of my very first picks when I started buying my own stuff.

I also remembered one time, when I saw mom put something on a cotton ball and applied it on her face. I was sooo curious I tried it on myself and guess what? It burned my nose! I was so embarassed to talk about it and just told anyone that I tripped over something and fell face down.

My mom had to leave for the US before my elementary graduation and stayed there 'til I'm 20, so I never got further kikay training from her. That sort of weakened my liking for cosmetics but didn't really kill it. I got by with using merthiolate to color my lips, and then my cheeks. Imagine that?! My late grandma and our helper used it, so why not?

I also tried to use baby powder to put a thick white line on my eyes because I didn't know what they used on celebrities. But since it tends to become transluscent as you spread it, I figured it's not effective for the look I wanted.

Growing up without my real mom (plus other factors that will not be discussed here...) gave me teen self esteem issues. But I found refuge in girly magazines such as Candy and Meg. From there, I got information on the latest beauty buys -their prices and where to find them, without having to personally ask another person. That's the time I learned about a Japanese transluscent medicated face powder, which I bought from PCX, The Body Shop's tea tree concealer and Bench cheek tints. I'll just go by the make up counters, get what I exactly needed and pay for it.

My self esteem issues continued even until now, which makes me love cosmetics all the more because good ones take care of my skin and make up make me look different if not better.

Now my daughter, seeing me doing all these kikay stuff, seems to be growing in the same vein, which for me is good. I just wish she does it because she loves herself and being a girl and not for something else. I'm still coping with some self esteem issues and do my very best to conceal it so that it doesn't influence her. I will also do everything I can in my willpower to always be around, at least until she can get by on her own.

So how about you, who influenced your being you?

your every woman,